Lack of Content Warning

This site is not for children. It contains coarse language and humor and complex social and political analysis. If your child reads this blog, then you have a weird kid. Congratulations. We need more weird kids, our Nation's future depends upon them.

Seriously, do some parenting. It's not my job.

.....................................................................................................Lack of Content Warning.............................................................................................................. I have been tasked with pointing out the blindingly obvious to those readers who have never heard of hyperbole or encountered humor in their day to day lives. The Angry Redneck Liberal is a character. A literary device by which I share my sincere policy views through the persona of a (usually, but not always) loud, profane, extreme and often-times offensive character. No one in their right mind takes his outrageous comments at face value. Rational, intelligent adults accept his schtick as an integral part of what makes him an (occasionally) entertaining read. Sometimes, a shocking statement is necessary to make a point, focus the reader's attention on a preceding point or (more often than not) just to get a cheap laugh. I made the Angry Redneck Liberal for that reason, and he performs his task admirably. I stand by every position I have put forth here. I hope you find it to be both a source of humor and food for thought.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Deficit Reduction for Pragmatists

          The Federal Deficit is a big deal.  We can not reasonably expect to continue to fund our way of life if the current levels of spending and current levels of taxation continue unchanged.  The question facing legislators is "Which one do we change?"  What they fail to grasp is that this is not a binary choice.  There is no "either/or" scenario, here.  The simple fact of the matter is we need to look at both.  We have to cut some programs' funding and we have to raise taxes.

          Federal taxes collected (well, owed) this year are equal 14.8% of the Gross Domestic Product, their lowest since 1950 and 2.7 % lower than they were in 2008, George W Bush's last year in office.  So much for the idea that Obama is raising your taxes' huh?  Not that it matters.  People believe what they want to.  Which is fine if you're talking about the Tooth Fairy, not so much when it comes to fiscal policy and the realities of governance.

          Republican leaders in the House have said that ANY deficit-reducing legislation which doesn't include tax cuts is a non-starter.  What a bunch of mouth-breathing (difficult with corporate America's dick in there) sub-morons.  I don't expect my representatives to be a Nobel Laureates in Economics, but I would like them to be able to count.  Hell, if told my stepson that:

     "Mary has THREE apples, but she needs FOUR apples to make a pie, should she:

          A.  Make a pie with less filling.
          B.  Get another apple.
          C.  Both.
          D.  Say, "Fuck it!", and give ONE apple back to the orchard man and shove the
               other TWO up the nearest homeless man's ass and then tell her kids to "JUST
               EAT THE GODDAMN PIE, ALREADY!!  I DON'T CARE IF IT'S JUST A BURNT
               CRUST!!",

          he would look at me as though I were insane and go back to poking the cat with a chopstick.  Kids?!  What fuckin' help are they?  They haven't done a damn thing to help the Republicans sort through this dilemma.  Perhaps if they were all "Snowflake Kids" that someone had purposefully thawed out and shoved into their Kid-Cooker Nine Eleven while Lord knows-how-many already-born kids languish in Foster Care, they could at least stand behind one of these douchebags while he rails on about the "sanctity of life" and "our most precious commodity" and "Yeah, I wanna cut Medicaid, SCHIP, WIC, Food Stamps and Head Start!  Fuck those poor pieces of shit!  These kids behind me used to be FROZEN EMBRYOS!  Can you believe that shit?!"

          Yes, that's cool, Huey Long, but it's just more smoke and mirrors on your part.  You're sidestepping the issue.  What do you mean you "don't actually exist and are just a straw man I constructed to act as an easily defeated opponent in an argument that only exist in my mind?"  Bravo, sir!  Well done!  Way to try and dodge the question!  I suppose that next you'll be trying to say that I have done nothing for the past few paragraphs but play around with humorous dialogue and pointless meandering side trips to fill a column when I don't have anything to say of any substance on this topic other than, "Taxes used to be higher.  They need to be higher again.  Republicans are dumb!  I curse all the time because it distracts people from the hollowness of my arguments and serves as a substitute for a the sort of linguistic skills that real writers both have and use in their daily columns!"  For which, you might then add, as a means of adding insult to injury, that they (unlike me) get paid.

          That would be very cruel of you.  I'm a sensitive soul.  I can be hurt.  If (contrary to your assertion) you actually exist, you should think about the hurtful things you have said to me.

          Anyhow, Republicans need to accept the necessity of tax increases on the rich (there are already tax increases for the non-rich built into Representative Ryan's budget plan) and Democrats need to accept the necessity of rescissions in some programs.  It's called "compromise" and "reasonable governance".  That's what they did for the first 212 years of our Nation, it's what all of you duly-elected representatives of the people should be doing, now.

Thanks for stopping in!
Tim "Can't Be Angry All The Time, But I Come Pretty Close" Murphy

1 comment:

  1. Mary had a little lamb. Key word is "had"; she put it in the pie after it was unable to produce a Birth Certificate to prove that it was, in fact, ever Mary's little lamb to begin with.

    ReplyDelete